Who's Your Daddy?

Did anybody care to think about the origin of this saying? When people use it today, it is used to show one's dominance over another human being either physically or mentally. Unfortunately, too many girls have bought into this saying. Let me elaborate. See, guys want their girlfriends to stay with them. Sigmund Frued says that men get a little depressed when they realize that their one way to satisfy their sex drive is so fragile. Meaning she could break up with him (divorce) or she could die or be rendered impotent. The former is the important one. No one can control when she dies (extrenuating circumstances disallowed), but she can dump the guy whenever she wants. Now the gentleman senses this and gets worried. In a relationship, each person vies for power over the other. One major card to hold is the "Break Up" card. What happens is that the guy wants to hold that card. Men are not as stupid as their appear. The guys that seem less intelligent (actually less self confidence) will try to berate their girlfriend to make her feel like crap. He will say or do things that will make her think that she could never get another guy. Lets recap, you have an egotistical guy with a depressed girlfriend. The guy takes advantage of this situation and now has the enviable task of comforting her. Its pretty easy, all he has to do is tell her that, even though she is a lousy girl, at least she has him. Now the girl is stuck in her mind with guy that deep down she knows isn't perfect for her, but thanks to the guy, she thinks he is the best she can get. Personally I think this behavior in guys needs to stop. Girls should be smart enough to know that if they were able to land this "Great" guy that they could get another one just as easily. Also guys need to realize that the girl obviously likes him if she is with him. I do understand however that riffs in the relationship could lead the guy to think otherwise and that is why he starts berating her. Hey, it will be worse down the road if he continues the relationship if they aren't compatible. You may ask why this thought, its just something that has bothered me. I like peacefulness.

The Key to Finding Someone

Its been 3 months since my last thought (below), but I have finally found something worth putting in here. I recently read an article that teaches men, could work for women too, on the art of flirting. Click here to read the article If you don't feel like reading the article I will summarize. It says that flirting is an art. Explicitly explained is the fact that a nice guy who can't flirt will not be as ept to find a nice girl as a lesser man that knows the art of flirting. That goes in line with everything I believe and answers many questions. The art of flirting is not what people stereotype it to be. They say that flirting is more of incidental conversation in public. Going up to someone and saying "Gee, your hot, wanna go to my room" isn't quite right. Firstly, do not let your intentions show (pretend its incidental). Incidental is to mean as, by chance, as if you randomly talked to the person. Also, make it a point that if you are going to point out something aboutthe person, point out a book s/he is reading, or something casual. Do not compliment the person by saying, "Nice shirt" or "nice eyes" unless you want to have good dress as the common bond. You have to sieze the opportunities. Its weird because you almost have to be like a cat. its all about knowing when to use your charm. If you accidentally bump into someone, don't say excuse me, think of something funny to say about the situation. If you are in a book store (you have some control here), look to see what kind of books the person of your desire picks up. Walk up to him/her and say "You like Pasta too? I love Linguine with clam sauce". If your flirting is successful and the conversation than its advisable that you give out your number rather than asking (nowadays you could use email address too). Say something like "If/When you make a good dish, call me, I'd like to try it". I do have questions for all of you out there, especially girls and I want you to email me your thoughts. Email me at ImPCFriar1@yahoo.com . OK, my questions for everyone is: 1 Do you think you could see the person behind their ability to flirt? 2 Do you think you'd dismiss a nice guy because of his inability to flirt? 3 Would you give the time of day to someone that is an awesome flirt. (I guess that is asking if you could get tricked). Remember, email me at ImPCFriar1@yahoo.com.

When to find your girl/boy friend


One key to finding someone is obviously your eye.  You have to know when to trust your eye.  It seems though that your eye is more important than you would think.  In today's society you have to use a first look to see if you like a girl.  (Read lower in the page for my first look, second look section.)
    Let me explain my point.  I have lived for a while looking for girls who I was already friends with to be the next girlfriend.  Well that never worked.  I'd hear, or they'd insinuate that they would want to remain friends with me.  So this got me thinking, hmmm, how do people get together.  I decided to ask people how they met their significant other.  More importantly, I took note to how long they knew that special someone before they became a couple.  It turns out that couples know each other for less than 1 month usually.  There are some that know each other longer, but few.  Many couples saw each other once or twice before their first date.
    It seems to be the norm not to know your potential girl/boy friend.  I guess that the "getting to know each other" part of the relationship is a lot of fun and worth doing.  Also it turns dating into a hit or miss situation.  The rule of the land is, just pick a person, ask him/her out and see if it works.  Its not the conservative, take time to know the person, like the person than ask him/her out.  Michael Bolton's song "How can we be lovers if we can't be friends" is not the theme song for anyone.


For your future, 1 day or 1 year or 1 life

      It took a while, but I finally put together another thought on life. I've noticed this odd trend that seems to be concurrent throughout many of life's decisions. I guess it came from looking at the people in High School who always seemed happy. Those were the people that were drunk all the time, and forgetting class. But the "nerds" were always told, "Don't worry son/daughter, they will be working for you someday". Reguardless if that exact thing happens, its a true statement. This leads me into my life's thought: For all the fun you have today, there will be less fun down the road. Also as a corollary to that The more you work today, the more fun you will have in the future. This shouldn't discourage people. Its not a 100% thing. See, sure you can have regular fun, and a nice future, but major things aren't good. I'll tell you what I mean. Lets take me for example. Anyone could easily have easily stopped my schooling and went for work at a remedial job. Maybe they'd get $8 an hour and be working 40 hrs a week. That's $320 (before taxes) a week ($16000 a year), not bad compared to what a full time student gets paid. On that I could get myself a new car, or move out of the house, probably not both. You would be independant and have the nights to yourself. You could go out with girls or guys, to clubs, bars, or nudity places and drink and smoke unknown drugs. Life would be easy for now. But it would be a strain to support a spouse and or kids on that income. (Please do not say to me its possible to make $50000 a year with a HS diploma, I know that). But now lets follow the college road. You would earn a lot more money, easily over $50000 by the time you am 40 probably 30 (If you pick a nice field or get a PhD). And seeing as you were not into drugs or drinking, and never had the opportunity to be a sleeze ball, you'd be a decent overall person. Not to discount drugs, but rather the lifestyle of living for the day. See you do anything to make yourself happy for the day that you may end up a bitter and worn out person. So hopefully a really nice girl or will find you and you could get married, and your higher income would be sufficient. Also for not taking the easy way through life I would like to think you'd be a better person. Through being a better and happier person, I believe you achieve a happier later life.
      You probably think I am trying to sell college and soberity to all of you and I am not. While you are young (I hope you aren't old) you can enjoy yourself. Have a good time, make yourself happy. Experiment with things to see what you want to do in later life. Lets take my concept to a more localized time frame. We shall venture to this Friday. Lets say there is a party that you are invited to. See you can have an awesome time at the party. Get drunk out of your mind, maybe have sex (or come close). Do lots of fun and raunchy things. You'd probably admit that is a nice idea. Or scenario 2: You could leave the vodka for someone else. You chat with friends, dance, heck, maybe go crazy. You have a decent time. Now on the next day person 1 is in the toilet puking while person 2 is sleeping well (unless s/he is sick). But, person 1 did have a better time at the party. So which route was worth it? That is entirely up to you. This 2 day scenario is the same with an entire life. Just pick what makes you happy. And remember, there is a happy medium.

What is the name of the next decade?

This is the 1990's. People refer to this decade as the nineties or nineteen nineties. The same holds true for the 80's, 70's, 60's to the 20s. Even, the nineteen tens. But what about the first decade? I think people referred to it as the nineteen hundreds, not thinking about the other 90 years they are going to include. So for 2000-2009, what should we call the decade? I've heard numerous suggestions. Some people say "The two Thousands", which seems kind of general and could include 2000-2999. Others say "The Oh Oh's" or "The Zeros" which doesn't sound too specific. Also, there is a suggestion of "Double Ots". Then, there is "The First decade of the next Millenium"-- by the time you are done saying this one, you would have forgotten what you wanted to say. Another suggestion I heard was "Don't worry about it the world will end in the year 2000 anyway" Granted it would be an easy solution, but it's not very optimistic.

The next decade
What name do you like for the next decade?

Current Results


First Look or Second Look

A first look person is usually someone who is a model, or could be one. S/he is a person you look at and say, wow s/he is beautiful, or hot.
Usually a first look person will take your breath away. This first look person works hard on their appearance. But if you look closely at the person again, you can usually see their personality come out. On the second look you say, "oh that person is no big deal." If you take the time to get to know a first look person, s/he is usually conceited, stuck up and selfish. 

Advantages and disadvantages 

Advantages: The advantages of a first look person are all aesthetic. If your mate is a first looker, you may get compliments from people saying, "your boy/girl friend is hot". Also, you may enjoy looking at your first look person. Perhaps show him/her off to your friends. Usually first look people can introduce you to more first look people. Also, you will probably get invited to more parties and meet new people. 

Disadvantages: Lack of personality. These people think the world should bow down to them and grant their every wish. You can not do enough for first look people. First look people think that having sex with them is a gift for the other person. They are usually only capable of caring for themselves. 

This usually happens to people who are attracted to first lookers.

A second look person is much different. When you first see one, you will probably say, "s/he looks nice". Than when you look again, you see his/her personality revealed through their smile, and eyes. That is when you say, "Wow s/he is really cute (or whatever word you like)". You may wonder what in a person's personality can make them look more attractive. Simple: a friendly, outgoing, sweet, generous, and happy person will have a much happier smile and brighter eyes. Also these people tend to have a "wholesome" look to them. They do not spend countless hours in front of the mirror, but they are genuinely beautiful so they don't have to.

Advantages and Disadvantages 

Advantages: There are many advantages to a second look person. Second look people sometimes put themselves second to you. They are not hung up on aesthetics. These second look people are the type of people that you can really look into their eyes and see their inner beauty. Second look people manage to find ways to make you smile. There is less pressure when you are out with a second look person than a first look person. Their smiles are usually to die for. 

Disadvantages: When you and your second look companion enter a room, people will not look at you in amazement. You guys may not be show stoppers to people you do not know, but the people who you talk to will be amazed at you two. Your second look date's charm will turn into a sparkle in her eye, but that is a plus to compensate for the disadvantage of not being a showstopper.


The first picture of me was taken professionally in July of 1997. The second picture of me was taken by my sister in July of 1999.

I've brought back the old poll. You can see how the world and you stack up on the opinion of first look or second look people.

Q: Which do you perfer?
First-Look person
Second-Look person

Do you retaliate or lead?

Do unto others as they have done unto you?

Fun little way to approach life. If someone crosses you, just cross him/her. An eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth. Living life like this lets you never feel cheated. You are never left with an expended feeling. You will take care of any problem. No one will walk over you. You could catch yourself opening a can of whoop ass once too often. You will realize that people can be cruel. Especially those who cross you and live with this philosophy.

Do unto others as you would like them to do unto you?

This is the official golden rule. If you want to be treated well, threat others well. Supposedly, by being nice to others, you should expect them to be nice to you. Sounds nice in theory. There is some truth to this matter. People are usually nice to people who are nice to them. If you adopt this philosophy, there are viscous people who would attempt to make you feel like a doormat.

Choose the lifestyle you live and see how you compare to others.

See how you compare
What is your personality like?

Do you retaliate?
Do you set the example?

Current Results